Trying

These past few days have definitely been interesting, but in a good way. I have been hit with various situations in just the past few days, but with some help I am learning what kind of person I really am and the things that I can still work on about myself. I have seen now that even though I continually put others before myself, I still need to be willing to accept help when it is given. I need to be able to put my guard down and allow those who care for me to be able to help me when they can. This will be difficult for me though because it makes me feel as if I am being a selfish person by wanting the attention and the help. This just means though that I need to work on my perspective on the whole thing, which I am consciously going to try to improve on. Just because people are willing to lend a hand, does not mean I am being a selfish person by accepting that hand.

The situation that arose today has also shed light on the person that I am becoming. I always try to be a fair person, but when it seems that comprises can't be reached, decisions must be made. This doesn't mean that things have to end ugly, but it just means that the easiest thing for everyone may be to go separate ways. It has been a lot to process so far, but I am trying.

I have also learned that I really don't hold any grudges against anyone. I am now trying to build a new friendship with someone whom I have had no type of relationship whatsoever with since high school. We both know that all of the past mistakes no longer matter and that they truly are all in the past. It is pointless to dwell on the things that happened because we both have grown up and are no longer immature students. I have no idea where this road will go, but I am excited to have an old friend back and I know it will be better than it was in the past.

Trying to process this all has been a whirl wind for me. I think my head is still spinning from trying to wrap my mind around everything. But it is an amazing thing to see the type of person you are and the things that you could work on about yourself. If we weren't able to grow as people, it would be super boring.

I hope this all made sense. I have so many thoughts running through my head right now and I don't know if I was able to fully get it out on here.

Chase Merrell - "With You"

As evident by all of my recent posts, I am currently addicted to Chase Merrell. I just love the music and lyrics. He actually writes about something, unlike some music today that talks about nothing. All of these songs have a message, with "Just Be" being my favorite. I just felt like sharing all of the lyrics with you guys, so I tried my best to type all of them because his lyrics do not exist on the internet. I have all four of the songs on iTunes, so if you want them just let me know. The music just adds a whole new level to everything. But if you just want to hear the music yourself, here is his myspace.

With You

Woke up this morning, rain outside

I can't stop running, trying to hide from You

Oh God, I'm broken inside

Desperate, confused till your arms open wide

One life

One chance, experience divine romance

One God

One love

Your grace is enough for me

I breath and lift Your mighty name

You are holy

I can't believe the price You paid just to be with me

Your blood was poured out on that cross

Can this love be true?

Everyday is a brand new chance to fall more in love with You

Love undeserving, grace and mercy I find

I hear you calling, "Oh child you are mine"

Under Your wings hold me next to Your heart

I whisper Your name, always close never far

One life

One chance, experience divine romance

One God

One love

Your grace is enough for me

I breath and lift Your mighty name

You are holy

I can't believe the price You paid just to be with me

Your blood was poured out on that cross

Can this love be true?

Everyday is a brand new day to fall more in love with You

I will follow you (x8)

I breath and lift Your mighty name

You are holy

I can't believe the price You paid just to be with me

Your blood was poured out on that cross

Can this love be true?

Everyday is a brand new day to fall more in love with You

Fall more in love with You

Fall more in love with You

With You, with You

More in love with You

Chase Merrell - "Beautiful Dream"

Beautiful Dream

I was dreaming again all through the night

Never want to wake up from this feeling so right

You were standing there looking at me

I couldn't stop staring at your beauty

Then I took a deep breath, counted to three

Prayed to God and got down on my knee

When I look at your eyes you capture my heart

It's really hard to breath when you're taking my breath away

You're taking my breath away

And girl who you are is blowing my mind

Baby this time I won't let you slip away

I won't let you slip away

It all just feels so real everything happening

Any moment I can wake up from this perfect dream

And just like that, it'll be all gone

Just a boy in his bedroom singing some love song

I know one day we'll meet again

If I can only fall back asleep

When I look at your eyes you capture my heart

It's really hard to breath when you're taking my breath away

You're taking my breath away

Girl who you are is blowing my mind

Baby this time I won't let you slip away

I won't let you slip away

When I think of you and me, everything we can be

It's so beautiful

When I look at your eyes you capture my heart

It's really hard to breath when you're taking my breath away

You're taking my breath away

Girl who you are is blowing my mind

Baby this time I won't let you slip away

I won't let you slip away

Taking my breath away

You're taking my breath away, away, away, away

Dreams are beautiful

Another Chase Merrell Song

Because I am the hopeless romantic type and I truly believe that God knows who I am supposed to spend the rest of my life with. =)

Chase Merrell - "Summer Skies"

I love you

I love you

Sweet dreams and lullabies are staring up at the summer skies

Trusting in the mighty King above to bring to me the one that I'm supposed to love

I pray about you every night and day

I can't wait to finally hear you say "I'll be with you till the very end because I love you"

I love you

Waiting patient cuz I know it's not a race, but I'll keep running till I see your pretty face

I've been saving my heart for you

I want a love that lasts and always stays true

Your prince is here to come and sweep you off your feet

I'll keep on fighting till that day we finally meet

I'll be by your side until the very end because I love you

God I trust you with my life

You know my desires and my future wife

And I'm so glad with you there is no fate

Now all I have to do is trust and wait

Girl, don't you know even though I'm not there to be your's right now

My God has it all in his hands?

Even when times get tough, I will turn and trust in His promises

His love will be the core of who we are

So I say girl, don't you know even though I'm not there to be your's right now

My God has it all in his hands?

Even when times get tough, I will turn and trust in His promises

His love will be the core of who we are

God I trust you with my life

You know my desires and my future wife

And I'm so glad with you there is no fate

Now all I have to do is trust and wait

Now all I have to do is trust and wait

I'll trust and wait

Chase Merrell- "Just Be"

I discovered this song this morning and haven't been able to stop listening to it. So I decided to type up the lyrics (couldn't find them online) and I think they are right for the most part. I just really like it because we do tend to get caught up with the things of everyday life. We get distracted by school, work, relationships, and everything else imaginable. The thing I took from this song is that no matter how much we get caught up in life, we need to make sure that we are always trying to love those around us (not the easiest thing to do). Just to focus on the basics of God, family, friends, and those in need. But I hope you enjoy the lyrics. The actual song adds a lot more to the lyrics, so if you want it I can send it because it doesn't appear that iTunes has locked it.

Just Be

It's really hard to fall asleep tonight

So many things running through my mind

Everybody thinks they know whats right for me and my life

It's like I'm living to please everyone

Hanging onto every opinion

The weight is almost too much to bare for me and my life

So much to do, so much to get done that we forget to stop and...

Just be a son and daughter

Everlasting father and rest in His arms of love

Just be a loving brother, take the time to listen to the crazy dreams he has

Just be a friend to someone who's lonely and without one, it may be the only love they see

If we would stop striving

Just be

I know they gotta a lot of things to say

I hear them now and almost everyday

Sometimes it's so hard to hear the voice of my God

Wish I didn't take so long to see no matter what you're still in love with me

Even when I let you down again I'm caught in your grace

So much to do, so much to get done that we forget to stop and...

Just be a son and daughter

Everlasting father and rest in His arms of love

Just be a loving brother, take the time to listen to the crazy dreams he has

Just be a friend to someone who's lonely and without one, it may be the only love they see

If we would stop striving

Just be